Expect to go backwards and you will go forward more quickly – a mindset to accelerate your growth and development.
Imagine you have golfed using one grip for your entire life, and now you learn, after a lesson with a fancy golf pro, that to get to the next level you need to change your grip. What do you think is going to happen the first few times you try to hit the golf ball using the new grip? Exactly. It’s most likely not going to go so smoothly. In fact, it will most likely feel odd and uncomfortable. If you are like most of us, you will continue to try that new grip a few times, but if you don’t get the results you are looking for, you will revert back to your earlier grip.
And that’s what is so handy about the “Four Stages of Learning” model. The four stages are: Unconscious Incompetence, Conscious Incompetence, Conscious Competence, Unconscious Competence. While many of us are aware of this model, what we forget is the implications of the second stage of learning (Conscious Incompetence). Once we become aware of something that needs to be changed, and replace it with a new behavior, we will actually get worse before we get better. This is a natural part of the learning process. The problem is most of us simply decide that the new way is too uncomfortable or doesn’t work, and revert to our earlier pattern. In short, we give up too quickly!
You’ve probably experienced this if you’ve ever gone to some type of public speaking training. Imagine the scenario when someone first learns that they are using a filler word like “um” or “like.” Instead of immediately improving, more often than not they become paralyzed – they have moved from “unconscious incompetence” to “conscious incompetence.” Prior to the training, they were unaware that they were using the filler word. So although they were not particularly effective as a speaker, at least they were able to get their words and thoughts out. Once they become aware of the filler word, yet haven’t perfected the new behavior (“pause”), their public speaking gets worse, not better. Suddenly, in the middle of the talk, they say the filler word, but now they hear it and often stumble or freeze. This same pattern of going backwards applies equally to a broad range of management behaviors – learning new coaching skills, shifting decision making styles, listening more effectively, etc.
Bottom line, when you try to adopt new behaviors or apply new skills, expect a period of discomfort and going backwards. In fact, even celebrate the discomfort, as this is a sign of progress. You’ve discovered the old pattern (consciously) and are creating a new pattern. Give that new pattern a chance to take hold, and if you find yourself after diligent practice unable to make the shift, find a mentor to give you additional tips to get to the stage of mastery.